You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
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