Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
You need a sexual gate keeper
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Randomize
