Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Please, let me fuck your mom
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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