U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize