cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Randomize
