I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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