My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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