Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
