why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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