no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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