I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
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