It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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