no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
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