I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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