scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
