Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
i believe in u and ur pee
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
