I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
