i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Tornado booty call.. dedication
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
