What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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