I don't think brook has ever known best
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
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