You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize