Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
