i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
