is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
