I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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