I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
