Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Randomize
