Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
