I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
