I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
