Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
