I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
i now understand why vodka
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
