Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I'm really busy with my period
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