just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
