If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
