does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
