So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
