you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
