So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Randomize
