I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Randomize