This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
