I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize
