Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Randomize
