so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize