we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
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I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
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