Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
