summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Randomize