I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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