I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize