Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
