He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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